Fangy new year
by Cricketpoor
Summary: Xander and Spike celebrates the new year and some secrets is told


Title: Fangy New Year

Author: Cricketpoor

Disclaimer: None of the "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" or "Angel the series" characters or places belongs to me, Live Journal doesn't belong to me either, the plot is all I can claim (I hope).

Rating: R

Parings: Xander/Spike, Buffy/Faith, Cordelia/Angel/Wesley (implied), Oz/?

Feedback: Give me, give me, give me, pretty please, with sugar on top?

E-Mail:

Archive: Ask first.

Summary: Spike celebrates New Year on his LJ and discovers some things.

Spoilers: S1, 2 and 3 of "Angel", I think but this is AU, people, so there isn't much.

Authors note: I wrote this for New Years Eve even if it wasn't up then. thanks to beetle for the beta

Soundtrack: The "Young Guns II" soundtrack by Jon Bon Jovi.

Once a year there's a certain tradition to drink champagne and stay up all night to see fireworks. It's a romantic night, a night for dreams. I will spend it in my own, as my friends have business on other locations. I'll be here by my lonesome. . . well that isn't entirely true. . . .

"Whatcha doin'?"

Spike glanced up to see Xander looking at him like he'd grown a second head.

"Typing, what's it look like, git?"

Short and straightforward, that was his style or at least he wanted that to be his style. . . .

"Typing what, on my computer?"

Spike sneered as as he desperately tried to come up with a good lie. When he couldn't, he decided the truth would have to do.

"Live journal post."

Xander's eyes looked like they were about to roll out of his head.

"You have a live journal?"

Spike nodded warily.

"What's your username?"

"None of your business!" Spike realized that was exactly the wrong thing to say even as he was saying it.

"Now, it's SO my business." Xander grinned, obviously willing to stand there till Spike gave in. Which he did, less than graciously. Xander took a look at the screen.

"No way! That's you?" Spike nodded. "Oh, wow."

"You're even more coherent than usual, Harris."

"I've been commenting on this journal for the last - well ever. See? That's me." Xander pointed at an icon Spike immediately recognized as belonging to one of his most faithful commenters.

"Bloody hell, Harris, that's you?"

They looked at each other, torn between horror and humor. Then they broke down laughing.

"So. . . ." Spike said, when the laughter tapered off.

"So. . . obviously we can be friendly on the net. . . ." Xander trailed off hopefully, blushing.

"We could probably be friendly in real life, as well," Spike offered.

When Xander beamed at him, he just smiled and cleared his throat.

"When's your next update?"

"Tonight, then once every hour tomorrow night."

"Crap!" Xander frowned. "I leave at four. . . ."

Spike shrugged. "Don't have net access where you're goin'?"

"I doubt that even Queen C could email me if AI didn't have Internet access." Xander chuckled.

"AI?"

"Angel Investigations."

That happy mood? Not so much with the happy anymore.

Spike stared at the computer screen for a few seconds, then looked up. "They don't know 'm a white hat, now, do they?"

"Well. . . I told them you live with me and that you help Buffy out. A lot!" Xander enthused, trying to get back the easy back and forth of a minute ago.

Spike just looked sadder.

"You don't believe me, none of you. Don't believe in me. . . I bet Slutty hasn't been singing my praises, either."

Xander felt bad for the vampire. What Spike'd said was essentially true. None of the others believed him or believed in him. Neither had Xander till a couple of minutes ago. Sure, Spike really was a big help. And all the Scoobies trusted him not to kill them.

No, they didn't trust Spike not to kill them. The trusted the chip to keep Spike from killing them.

"Look, Spike - I wish there was a way for us to magically trust you. Just a couple of minutes ago I knew that you were only a white hat because of the chip. Now, I don't know if it's the chip or you. And I guess I can't be sure. None of us can -"

"It's gone." Spike said softly, not looking up at Xander.

"Wha- ?" Xander went cold inside, but resisted the urge to edge toward the door. "When?"

"Six months ago."

Xander counted backwards in his head and was hit with a revelation.

"It was you!" He almost-accused Spike, who finally looked up, obviously puzzled. "You! The YOU you not the CHIP you! You saved my life!"

"Oh, that. Yeah. What about it?"

Xander rolled his eyes. "Gee, Spike, you really care." Then he was ducking the empty soda can Spike lobbed at his head with a muttered "tosser".

"So, finish that update. That way I'll have something to look forward to when I go online later."

Spike smiled back and turned towards the computer. Then he turned back and said:

"Wait, Harris - is Mr. Pointy gonna be featuring prominently in my New Year?"

Xander's look was weighing, intense. But then he smiled.

"Why on Earth would the Scoobies waste Mr. Pointy on you, fangless?"

Spike smirked and turned back to his journal entry.

Only when Xander's footsteps faded from even vampire hearing did the smirk turn into a huge smile.

**. . . I have you, my lj friends, and I know that at least one of you will be here for my updates. Tomorrow from four pm and once every hour till midnight -**

**Have any of you ever been made ridiculously happy by something - someone you least expected? If you have I'll just say congratulations. **

**It's a feeling I could definitely get used to, dunno about you. . . .**

**Take care, all, and I'll see you tomorrow. **

"Later, Harris. Have fun." Spike couldn't keep the mope out of his own voice.

"Don't worry, we'll figure out a way to tell them. One that won't get you staked. I mean - you've saved a lot of people since the chip's been out. Wills or Giles'll be able to do a spell or something to prove you're all - white hat-y -"

"Yeah, I know, we'll show 'em some day. But not today, so go, or you'll be late."

"I'll see you later then, okay?"

Spike nodded.

When Xander's car was out of sight he closed the door and walked over to the desk. He sat down with a sigh and logged on to the 'net.

It was going to be a very long night.

**4pm post and comments**

**The Night of nights is here. Soon there'll be parties starting, family dinners to attend. . . . but for all the lone wolves out there, I'll be here in front of the computer, waiting for your story. Why are you a lone wolf? Why aren't you spending tonight with your family, your friends or maybe your significant other? **

**Waiting for you to fill the silence, mates.**

**i'm spending tonight with friends in Hawaii. it's warm and it'll be fun to celebrate the New Year in a swimwear instead of a tux and coat! J**

**That does sound like fun. . . just remember not to swim drunk.**

**will do ;D **

**happy new year!**

**I'm hanging with my bf tonight, watching the ball drop, nothing fancy. I hope you have a fun night.**

**Ah, a romantic night, enjoy it while it lasts. **

**I will! Sorry I won't be around for your late night updates. . . .**

**No worries, be with your boyfriend. . . .**

**I'm in a huge hotel with my friends, my ex and my roommate's family. Did you know that Angel has a son?**

**Hello. . . He has a what?!? **

**His son is named Connor. You'll get to meet him tomorrow when we come back to Sunnydale D**

**I hope you're okay tonight, I'm sorry you couldn't be here.**

**Do I know you, mate?**

**Sure you do, childe**

**Sire?????**

**I'm another lone wolf, I'll be around all night, too, but I hope you have some fun. . . .**

**Sure thing.**

**Good. . . .**

**5 pm post and comments**

**Everyone who has something to eat for dinner, I hope you enjoy it. Hope the rest of you have a good time, too.**

**I'm feeling a little bowled-over. . . just found out that I have a - baby brother. It was quite the surprise, but a pleasant one. I hope you all get some of the same. Tonight is a night impossible things happen, dreams come true and faith is kept no matter what it looks like. . . .**

**i'm kept?!? WTF?!? why doesn't anyone tell me this shit?**

"**Faith" as in - the-chosen-two "Faith"?**

**the one and the same, Willy.**

**Aren't you in, er, a ladies' reformatory?**

**let's just say I'm out on good behavior. anyway i'm at the Hyperion, hangin with this mopey brunet who's bumming everyone out cuz you ain't here. . . you two more than friends?**

**What? No, of course not.**

**had me fooled. gotta let someone else use the computer. later.**

**So. How are you really?**

**I'm good. . . don't feel as alone as I did a few hours ago.**

**That is of the good. Very of the good.**

**It is. . . and you should cheer up, I'll be fine when I can kick Angel's huge arse tomorrow, or when ever they show up.**

**Okay, then, but I'll be here for your next post. Uh-oh. Angel wants to talk to you about that arse comment.**

**Does he, now?**

**Boy, does he.**

**My WHAT arse????? **

**Huge**

**It isn't huge. . . I'm glad you think Connor's good news.**

**Is, too. . . and he is good news, as long as he isn't as broody as his dad.**

**Is not. . . and he wont be.**

**Is, too, and I sure hope not.**

**You have some cool friends there, no wonder you have fun. . . . I couldn't borrow them for a while, could I?**

**If you're really nice. . . Or if I get bored with them ;D**

**Okay I'll cross my fingers then. . .**

**You do that, mate.**

**6 pm post and comments**

**Ever been so happy that you wondered if it was all a dream and everything would just disappear when you woke up? I'm having that kind of happy, right now. Are you? It's getting dark out, on this end. I might be a bit late with my next update but don't worry, I'll be here.**

**I promise.**

**you going out? go, Willy!**

**Just a quick sweep.**

**oh. be careful. no dying on my watch. **

**Don't worry, Faith, I'll be fine.**

**Then I'll worry; I don't want to lose you.**

**You won't. . . God I understand why Faith thinks we're - you know.**

**What?**

**Bloody hell. Scroll up, git.**

**OMG!!!! **

**Yeah. Tell Slutty I'll do her job better than she ever did.**

**She can see what you just typed, you know.**

**Good for her.**

**Lol…**

**Who's Slutty?**

**Friend of a friend.**

**Can I meet her?**

**Whatever. . . I gotta warn you though she has a mean right hook…**

**Ouch. . . I think I'll pass. . . .**

**Again, whatever….**

**7 pm post and comments**

**Sorry I'm late but I had a rough day at the office.**

**No clouds in the sky here and the stars are out I gotta have something warm to drink and put on a record before next post.**

**How many did you get?**

**Four**

**Were they tough?**

**Nah. . . .**

**Can't wait to get back out there.**

**You're back, good. . . we'll have to talk when I get back.**

**Okay, is that a god or a bad thing?**

**Depends on what you say. . . .**

**Does this have anything to do with what Faith said?**

**Not necessarily. . . .**

**But it might.**

**Yeah. **

**I gotta say it again: you have a bunch of really great friends, can I have them?**

**MINE.**

**Okay. . . maybe I could be your friend, too )**

**Let me think about it.**

**8 pm post and comments**

**Four hours left. Tell me - are you saving the champagne for midnight, or starting a little early?**

**champagne! god, I love the bubbly! and good thing I'm not in my cell with miss i'm-a-big-bad-drug-dealer. the old girl's about as scary as a pair of slippers, haha.**

**That's nice. Not your cellmate, the champagne. Are you charming Mr Broody-pants?**

**i'd have to get on line behind the fine pieces of ass already charming him. B, on the other hand. . . .**

**You're kidding?!**

**no. B's pretty hot, you know.**

**Actually, I don't know, but if you say so. . . . **

**You don't look at Buffy that way? **

**Nope.**

**Why? **

**Tell you tomorrow.**

**A soda for me, I think, and you?**

**O neg.**

**Nummy.**

**Isn't it, now?**

**9 pm post and comments**

**Love conquers all, or so "they" say and from what my friends tell me it's true. People I never thought would get together are coupling up - if only for the Night of nights. Which is good, but it makes me feel kind of lonely, again. So, hit me back with your unlikely love story.**

**One word: Buffy**

**Already know that story, ta!**

**You asked.**

**Whatever :P**

**I had a crush on this guy in high school and we weren't bad for each other, but we didn't fit together.**

**You and a guy? I didn't think you had it in you…**

**Well, I haven't. I'm still a virgin.**

**Okay. Don't think I needed to know that.**

**But now you do, you'll find out more tomorrow. . . .**

**I was with a witch, not a fairy tale witch but a Wiccan, I left her after something really bad happened during our first year in collage…'**

**Lemme guess: you're a bassist?**

**Yeah. Wow!**

**Thought so.**

**How'd you guess?**

**You'll see….**

**10 pm post and comments**

**Two hours left and I don't know what to say, so I'm gonna let someone else do it for me:**

**dyin' isn't much of a livin'**

**If you're livin' on the run**

**Dyin' isn't much of a livin' for the young**

**Is it to late to ask for forgiveness**

**For all the things that I have done**

**Dyin' isn't much of a livin' for the young**

**A little something by a poet named Jon Bon Jovi. Some of you will get it and some of you won't. You get-its probably know who I really am. . . .**

**Never pegged you for the Bon Jovi type… **

**I'm not. It's from the Young Guns II soundtrack. It's really good.**

**You saw Young Guns II?**

**Had to see how they did Billy, didn't I?**

**Why?**

**Cuz I knew him.**

**Really?**

**Yup. Real stand-up bloke.**

**It isn't too late. I forgive you.**

**Are you sure?**

**As sure as my middle name's LaVelle?**

**Your middle name is "LaVelle"? ROTFLMAO**

**You didn't know that? Damn, just forget it, okay?**

**Not a chance, LaVelle. But I wont spread it around, either.**

**You know, this is starting to sound familiar. . . .**

**I know.**

**How?**

**That would be telling D**

**11 pm post and comments**

**One hour to go and we're all getting tired, but we all know that ushering in the first day of the new year that awaits us is well worth it. Are you willing to let the past go and take that step into the future?**

**Sure am. . . .**

**Does that future have room for me?**

**I think it does.**

**:D**

**I already have.**

**Good. . . . We'll talk tomorrow?**

**Yeah? When?**

**Wake me up when you get home.**

**First thing.**

**I wish I could. . . .**

**You'll get the chance, soon.**

**How can you be sure?**

**I just am.**

**If you're sure. . . .**

**00.0Post and comments**

**Happy New Year to all! We're now in a whole new year, with a shiny-clean slate. This is my last post of the night, so tell me: have you made any resolutions for this year? **

**my resolution is to get out of prison. i have a girlfriend to fuck.**

**Er, let me know if I can help. With the parole, not the fucking.**

**sure thing. happy new year, Willy.**

**Ditto ;)**

**My resolution is to not be afraid.**

**Of what?**

**You'll see.**

**Okay. . . .**

**Night.**

**Good night.**

**I'm gonna come home….**

**You do that.**

**I'll see you then.**

**Yeah.**

"Spike! Wake up!"

A soft "mmmhp?" was heard from underneath the covers. Xander shook the other man again.

"Come on, you told me to wake you up, so -wake up!"

Spike pushed the covers back, sat up and blinked sleepily. When he realized who was shaking him, he smiled.

"Home all ready?"

Xander nodded and returned the smile, smoothing Spike's unruly bedhead. Spike leaned into his touch wit a contented sigh. Then Xander reluctantly stood up.

"I'll be in the kitchen. We can talk over breakfast, okay?"

"Okay."

Spike got dressed and went into the kitchen. Xander sat drinking coffee and staring out the window. Spike opened the fridge to get some blood for himself before sitting down. He watched Xander until the microwave pinged! then took his blood and sat down at the tale.

"Talk, then."

In the silence, Spike could hear Xander's heart rate pick up.

"I'm gay."

Spike didn't comment, didn't scream and didn't walk away.

"I've known a while. Ever since Larry came out to me. I've only, uh, dated one man and it was a disaster. Currently, I have a crush on this guy I met online and yesterday, I found out that he was someone I knew in real life.

"That crush is you, Spike. The Internet you. I didn't know it was YOU you, though, and I know you're straight and all, but this it is just too big for me to not tell you - and I totally understand if you wanna run away screaming, now, but I had to tell you, just had to. I -"

"'M not exactly straight, m'self."

Spike's quiet comment cuts right into Xander's babble. It also confused him, judging by the look on his face.

"Drusilla?"

"Cordelia?"

"But that's different!"

"Is it?"

They looked at each other for a long time before Xander said:

"I think you better just tell me the whole story."

"You sure you really wanna know the details of my sordid and evil past?" Spike dared, a predatory smile on his face.

Xander wavered, obviously not sure he should call Spike's bluff. Finally, he threw up his hands.

"Okay, so - you're gay?"

Spike smiled and sipped his blood. "More or less."

"What about me?"

Now it was Spike's turn to look confused.

"What about you? Not so sure you like blokes anymore?"

"No! I mean yeah, but - what do you think of me? Do you find me attractive?"

Spike looked the boy over, slowly before meeting his eyes. His big, hopeful brown eyes.

"Sod it - I really like you, the 'net you, that is. And I find YOU you very attractive. Thing is. . . I really, really like the net you. You follow me?"

Xander sighed. "Wow, now I've got guys telling me they just wanna be friends. Perfect."

"You know what I mean."

He did know what Spike meant, why the hesitation.

Xander didn't want to lose a friend, either.

"I know, but I really want us to take this step. I really want you, Spike. The 'net you and real life you. Please, don't let this chance just slip away."

Spike tried to hold on to his reservations in the face of Xander's pleas, but couln't. No

"Alright, then we'll give it a shot. But we'll move slowly or not at all, yeah?"

"Yeah! Oh, yeah!" Xander nodded and bounced in his seat before asking, nervously:

"Would kissing you be moving to fast?"

Xander watched Spike stand up and walk around the table, then pulled the vampire onto his lap.

"This is gonna be one fangy year." Xander said, holding Spike close.

"Mm, but a good one," Spike murmured as their lips met.

The End


End file.
